10.27 one year ago...

late at night one year ago (okay it was the morning on 10/28 - but really, the thoughts were running through my head all of 10/27) I sent this facebook message to one of my closest friends and confidants... {aka my Danny J}...

 

October 28, 2009 at 1:50am

if you dont call me this week we're no longer friends

no seriously, I'm having a life-crisis and need your input

who would have known how much that message impacted my life... well as it turns out... I figured things out for myself without talking to Danny... I came to terms with the fact that the relationship I had been in for the past three years was over - not something to get into in a public forum, but I knew that I couldn't move forward without trust - 100% trust in another person... and I just didn't have it. It just wasn't right, so it hurt and I was scared - but I ended it.

the next day... DJ called and we talked for hours, he had ended his engagement the previous year so he had an idea of what I was going through and struggling with... I felt terrible that I was hurting someone who really was important to me... I also was scared - I had my future planned out and I was the one throwing a curveball and ending things - ending everything I said (and thought) I wanted for the past three years.

As always, it felt good to talk to Danny... he put me at ease and made me laugh and smile... In passing I mentioned that even though we talked fairly often it had been almost three years since we had seen each other and we started talking through maybe coming to see each other...  I mentioned coming to visit for Thanksgiving and I definitely threw him for a loop... he said he had to talk to work and that he'd get back to me [aka STALLING]... Oh Danny... gotta love him... clearly, I came to visit and everything fell into place for us - all I can say is I'm the luckiest girl on earth and I wouldn't change a thing in my life because it lead me to where I am today... with my soulmate.